Just Friends

I hate that I ruined a perfectly good friendship by doing what I did. I wish I could take everything back but at the same time I don't. I loved what we were. I loved what we became even more. I hate how we ended up the most. The fact is, when you "date" a friend you risk everything. You risk trusting them more than you ever thought you would and you risk the friendship changing no matter whose fault it is. I miss him, I won't lie. But I miss him, "the friend" more than I miss him "the lover". What is even worse is I've decided to limit myself on how and where I'll find love. I won't date another friend but what if he happens to be the one I've been looking for? I hate to, not only limit myself in the type of love I'm looking for but also punish a guy who really does deserve the best of my love. Ugh. I'm drunk.